Enough about the little dude for a minute. Let's talk about me. (Egocentric? Yes. It happens.)
So what have I been up to? (I'm assuming you've been wondering this. No? Ok, well, whatever. Just go with it. Or stop reading. Either way.)
I'd say that right now I'm still identifying most with the title of "mom". I feel like I'm finally comfortable in this roll and actually good at it. I like taking care of Lukas, I like every aspect of being a mom so far. Even the dirty diapers, laundry and other mundane tasks. Mothering is definitely one of the things I was meant to do in this life. I'd be lying if I said I don't get frustrated, mainly when I'm in the middle of trying to soothe a teething boy or cleaning the poop out of the tub, but even those are things that I find joy in. Because they're all for this little guy. And he's just so cute and in this great stage of learning and changing so much right now.
But I said we weren't here to talk about him.
I'm still working full time. I'm now in my 5th year as a lawyer, at the same firm I started with out of law school. Most days I love my job. The people are what make it great. My boss is understanding and respectful of the fact that I have a family, and because of that, I have a more positive outlook towards work and don't mind working in the evenings and weekends, if need be. I leave work at 5 on the dot most days, which gives me a few hours with Lukas in the evenings. But it's hard to juggle work and home life, especially when I'm busy. I've been getting in the office around 8 every day, working until 5 and then about every other day I end up working a few hours at night after Lukas goes to bed. This leaves little time for housework, leisurely activities, friends and even Mr. Cob. Time management and trying to do everything I want to do is the hardest part of being a working mom. I usually feel like I'm neglecting someone or something in my life. Often, that someone is myself. I'm having a hard time fitting in exercise time, which is something that I enjoy doing and something that makes me feel good about myself. And if I do find time to exercise, that's time that I'm not able to spend with Mr. Cob. And time with him, especially alone, is hard to come by these days. I still don't know how some women do it all, and make it look easy. Because it's not. But I'm trying to figure it out as we go and not beat myself up in the process.
While I can't find too much time to exercise, I have managed to lose ALL of the baby weight. As in all SIXTY FIVE plus pounds of it. And then some. (But let's not mention the fact that I've lost a ton of muscle tone too...). I was doing Weight Watchers, and am still signed up for it, but have been bad about keeping track of my points the past two weeks. WW definitely helps you realize what you are eating and change your habits as needed. But the other reason I swear I've been able to get rid of this weight is because I'm still nursing. I really believe it's helped me get the weight off. I'm almost at the 11 month mark of breastfeeding and plan on continuing until Lukas is one and then cutting back or stopping altogether. I've heard that your body drops another 5ish pounds once you stop nursing, so that'll be a nice plus at the end. I would like to tone up and get some muscle definition back, as well as work out a few times a week. Now with the cooler weather coming in, I can take Lukas out in the jogging stroller and hopefully get back in to running. And it really does feel great to fit back in my clothes again. It may have taken 9-10 months to drop the weight, but that's how long it took me to gain the baby weight and I'm not a crazy celebrity non-eating woman, so I'll take the 9-10 month time frame. And the best part, I not only have my old, thinner body back, but I now have boobs to go with it. Maybe I'll never stop nursing...Just kidding. Maybe.
Well that's enough about me for now. I'm sure I'll write about the little guy again soon. I just can't help myself. I'm obsessed.
Another Lukas post. Because I haven't written in the baby book in, eh, 2-3 months. Oops.
So words. The little dude can definitely understand more than he can say, but he's starting to say, or attempt to say more words. His vocabulary includes the following:
Night-Night (aka "nigh nigh")
He can clap when he hears the word clap, even if he doesn't see you clapping. If you ask him to point to the fan he looks up for the fan. It's fun stuff.
But without a doubt, his biggest obsession is the dog. (And the cat, which I believe he thinks is a dog. Ok, so he thinks anything furry with legs is a dog. What can I say - he's a baby.) Well his Grandma Kae bought him his first stuffed animal dog and he l.o.v.e.s. it. Like for real. It's come in handy in convincing him to walk more and get the walking on tape.
Life has been happening lately. So blogging has not. Not that anyone has probably missed me. Anyone even out there? Hello???
So what have we been up to? In a nutshell:
Lukas started walking. Like for real walking. As in, he can walk clear across a room without falling. Does this mean I have a toddler? Toddle is a good description of the way in which he walks. I need to get a good video, but in the mean time, picture a miniature drunk sailor wobbling along half running taking lots of mini shuffle-esque steps with his hands raised in the air. Usually with a big grin. Onlookers tend to smile after seeing this silliness. It's infectious.
Mr. Cob turned 30 and I managed to plan and execute a surprise 30th birthday trip to Chicago for him (and me and Lukas). His brother from Miami flew in, his sister and her boyfriend spent the weekend with us, his two childhood best friends helped us celebrate (one driving in from Iowa and the other secretly helped me plan the whole thing along with his sis) and his parents babysat - it was amazing! We even fit in a playdate with two of Mr. Cob's college buddies and their kids. We had a quick trip, but it was so fun. I love Chicago and feel like I'm supposed to live there one day. Probably not any day soon because I would want to live in the city, and I think we've missed that window for the time being. I told Mr. Cob that when our kiddos are grown and we have more money than we do today, maybe we can rent a condo in downtown Chicago and live there for a year. It just makes me so happy to be outside walking down Michigan Avenue. I think I'm a city girl at heart.
We have a busy fall ahead of us full of family and friend visits, a wedding, two trips to the beach, Lukas' baptism and then his first birthday. Life is busy, but good.
I had prayed I wouldn't have to write this post. But sometimes the power of prayer just isn't enough. God has different plans.
My friends Emily and Chris lost their 9 month old son Marco this morning. Within a little over two weeks he first showed signs of being sick, was diagnosed with cancer and passed away. It is not fair. He was such a sweet soul with a beautiful smile. He was just a little baby.
There are no words to make this "better" or spin this tragedy. I'm trying to stay positive, but that's very hard to do when you can't make sense of something. I like to believe that everything happens for a reason, but today I don't know what that reason is. God works in mysterious ways, but I'd like to ask him "why?" on this one.
I pray that Marco's momma and daddy have strength to get through unimaginable time. Please keep them in your prayers and thoughts and send them love.
Please hug and kiss on your family a little tighter and a little longer than usual tonight. Make that phone call to whoever it is you've been holding off calling for whatever reason. Say you're sorry to whoever you've wronged. Reach out to that friend you haven't been in touch with. Be kind to both neighbor and stranger alike. Call your momma just to tell her you love her.
Life is truly precious and too often we take it for granted.
Sweet Marco, I know you're an angel in Heaven now, safe in the arms of God. You will be missed by so many.
I promise I'll stop posting just videos and pictures sometime soon. I do have some stuff I'd like to write about, but just haven't sat down to do so. In the meantime, here's another video of the little dude. He likes ice cream. Big shocker.
I've sat down to write a few posts in the past week since my last one, but nothing seemed "right". Every topic seemed cavalier compared to what my two friends were going through. It seemed almost rude to follow up a post about two babies in the hospital with a post about what my silly baby is doing. My heart goes out to these two families and I’ve also felt a tinge of guilt for having a healthy child myself. Which, I know, is silly. But I love these friends dearly and keep praying that both kiddos will be ok. Seeing these parents deal with what they have been has made me reevaluate what is important in life and spend as much time as possible with my loved ones.
Speaking of my loved ones – look at these two sweet guys:
The taller one and I celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary last week. Well, we had it. We're celebrating this week. Our usual babysitters were in California visiting my brother so we postponed our dinner out and gift-giving a few days. We stick with the traditional wedding gifts, so we'll see what leather gifts we each come up with this year...
Oh and we broke our anniversary tradition. (Can you call it a tradition if you've only done it two years?) We've watched our wedding video every year on our anniversary. But neither one of us remembered this year. At all. Until two days later, at which point it was too late. The tradition was broken. I think we'll pick it up again next year. Or not.
As for the shorter little dude. He will be TEN months old in a few days. Two days to be exact. (Where did the time go?) He decided he'd start walking this weekend! At first he'd just walk from the ottoman to the couch (2 steps). And by walk, I mean teeter. And then last night he definitely took 4 steps to give me a hug! I love my little man. And I love my big man. I'm a lucky girl having these two guys in my life. They make me smile.