Avoiding Holiday ‘Mom Guilt’
Thursday, December 19, 2013
Avoiding Holiday ‘Mom Guilt’
Sunday, December 15, 2013
"Coloring with L this Sunday morning:
L: Mommy do you like coffee?
Me: yes, I love coffee!
L: Daddy likes beer!
Me: (laughing) yes, he does.
L: ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME?!?"
Captured with Momento – http://momentoapp.com
Saturday, December 7, 2013
My dad thinks he looks like a storm trooper! What do you think???
I'm still getting used to the whole thing but luckily Julian is warming up to his new accessory. He gradually works up to wearing it 23 hours a day. Today he wore it a total of 6 hours and did great. Tomorrow he'll take his first nap in the helmet. I'm hoping that goes well. Perhaps the helmet will turn out to be some magic sleep solution and he'll start sleeping through the night. One can wish!
Otherwise we are doing OK. More on that later.
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Monday, November 18, 2013
We read our 2 books- Giraffes can't Dance and Chugga Chugga Choochoo. Then his "one more book". Tonight was Say Please. After books he needed water and then all his stuffed animals had to be tucked in. Then I laid in bed with L and we talked. We giggled and hugged and cuddled. He wanted a story so I made one up about the octonauts - Kwazie and Barnacles helped Harold the hermit crab find a new shell (he took over hermit crab Lila's old shell). L loved the silly story.
It was a good end to a tough day. He reminded me how truly lucky I am. I get to be his momma. And that makes all the hard things seem not so bad.
Captured with Momento – http://momentoapp.com
Friday, November 15, 2013
This working mom thing is rough. With two kids its rougher than it was with one. And this is our busy season at the office so I'm fully engaged at work, as in have enough work to work all through the weekend engaged.
Lawyering momma of two would be enough for now. But I don't like to be bored so we're making life interesting. We listed our house for sale 11 days ago. We've had two showings and a third scheduled for tomorrow morning. So the house has to be "show ready" at any given moment. Did I mention that I have a three year old and a four month old. Who have way too many toys and don't exactly like to keep things neat and tidy? Nevermind the two adults that live in this house who are not exactly make-the-bed, clean the counters, vaccum the floors daily type of people. If the house doesn't sell soon I might go crazy. Or potential buyers will just have to deal with a less than perfectly tidy house. But if we do sell the house we have no idea where we'll go. I see a brief stint at my parents house in our future. We can't decide on a neighborhood. We can't even decide to stay intown or move to the burbs. I honestly have no idea where our next house will be located. It's an adventure, right? Yes, the answer is yes.
Did I mention that the baby isn't sleeping well? He's been waking up every 1-2 hours a night to nurse. I haven't slept longer than 3 hours at a time in weeks. Combined with my whacked out hormones and I'm a joy to be around. Lack of sleep is serious business. And I'm supposed to be making lawyerly decisions on no sleep. Right, that doesn't exactly work. So we're laying down the law and starting cry it out officially tonight. Little man J cried for exactly 18 minutes tonight before falling asleep after rolling over on his belly. I plan on doing a dream feed before I head to bed (where you feed the baby while he's still asleep) and then he's going to cry it out if he wakes up again anytime before 5am. Last night was unofficial cry it out night 1 and he cried for a full hour at 3:30 in the morning. It sucked. But this morning he was all smiles and had no recollection of the evil mommy action of the prior night. So tonight it's on. Wish us luck. (Did I mention I was drinking wine? It's not a coincidence.)
Since I'm on this woe-is-me roll, I'll keep going. My hair is falling out in clumps. Clumps. It is gross. And I may have forgotten to clean the drain in the shower before our house showing last Saturday. And the shower door was definitely open when we got home even though we closed it before leaving. Yup, the potential buyers saw my drain hair. Shocking that they didn't make an offer, no?
And the kicker, because there has to be one. We have an appointment next week at Scottish Rite for potential cranial remolding for Julian. In layman's terms, my sweet baby is likely to start wearing a helmet to correct his rather misshappen head. I know, I know, helmets are almost chic these days for babies thanks to the whole "back to sleep" campaign. But it still breaks my heart.
Ok, I'm done now. This is my life right now. I know that nothing is life shattering or even a big deal, but it's just a bit much to handle all together at the moment. I know that this too shall pass and soon enough I'll be sleeping all night,my hair will stay attached to my head, work will slow after the new year and Julian will have a round head in no time. But for now, I think I'll have another glass of wine.
Friday, November 8, 2013
|Mommy and her THREE YEAR OLD little boy!|
|2011 - Lukas' FIRST birthday!|
|A year ago - Lukas' 2nd birthday!|
|3 years old!|
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Monday, November 4, 2013
So I have to say a very big thank you to Emily for making my little man feel very special for this third birthday. Yesterday meant more than I can express in words.
|Taking it all in as we sung him Happy Birthday!|
|Blowing out his candle|
For all you busy moms out there, please remember one thing: It's OK to ask for help and to ACCEPT it when it's offered. It really does take a village.
Friday, November 1, 2013
We have a lot going on, it's true. We're listing our house to sell next week. We're on the hunt for a new car after the husband's car was totaled two weeks ago in a hit and run accident. I'm back to work full time and Julian is still waking up an average of three times a night. I've been on the verge of tears most days the past few weeks, and wound up crying on more than one occasion. It all just feels like "too much" right now. And the fact that the thing to go is my son's birthday party makes me feel awful.
It's mom guilt at its worst. I know I should let it go and that Lukas will not care or even notice that an extravagant party is not had. He'll be psyched about cupcakes, my parents coming over to celebrate and opening presents. And I'll send cupcakes and stickers to school so he can celebrate with his school friends. But it's hard not comparing to what these other moms are doing. Facebook and Pinterest display their thoughtful ideas and it just feels like I can't keep up.
I know it's not a contest. There's not a trophy for best mom. And I know that throwing a party does not a good mom equal. But I still can't let it go.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
So going back in time to Friday, July 12. I went to work that day expecting to go back to work the following Monday. I was only 39 weeks and 3 days at that point. Lukas was born at 40 weeks plus 3 days so I figured I might as well get comfortable. I even had Mr. Cob snap a picture of my growing belly that night.
|39 weeks + 3 day belly|
At 6:30 the nurse came in to say my OB wanted to start me on pitocin since nothing was really progressing. I asked if we could give it 30 more minutes to see if things would pick up on their own. She agreed. Nothing progressed. So they started the pitocin. (Which, if you're keeping score, I'm now 2 for 2 on the pit front. Oh well.) Around this point someone checked me and I was like 3 cm, so not much progress.
My OB came in around 8:30 to check on things. The pitocin had made the contractions pick up in timing, but they still weren't of the painful variety. She checked me and said I was closer to 4cm. She then broke my water. Now, let's talk about this for a second. I had thought I felt some leaking before the big water breaking event, but chalked it up to wishful thinking. Well after the water breaking (the big gush variety), which took her some time (we think his head was really low and was preventing the water from breaking on its own), things started to pick up. As in I went from totally cool and in no pain to having to breathe through the contractions and really concentrate in the span of 30 minutes. By 9:30am I was in some serious pain, but still breathing through. By 9:45am I lost my mind and was screaming for drugs.
The anesthesiologist was called and on his way. This did not change the fact that I completely lost it from about 9:45am -10am. The pain was too intense. My nurse (Katherine Hill, who just happens to have the same name as my BFF) was INCREDIBLE. And so was Mr. Cob. If it wasn't for them I'm not sure I could've made it through that 30 minute span before the doc gave me the epidural. It was rough. The contractions were very intense and very close together. I do think the hypnobirthing techniques I learned with Lukas (and practiced during my nightly meditations before bed this go around) helped keep the pain at bay for as long as it did and helped me somewhat breathe through the really bad contractions.
Finally the doc with the goods arrived to get rid of the pain.
But I lost it again when he was there because the mere thought of a needle in my spine sends me over the edge. Thankfully he was quick and painless (seriously, the insertion of the epidural did NOT hurt). And within 5 minutes the pain was gone completely. BUT, the pressure started before the anesthesiologist even left the room. The pressure down there. You know, there there. I mentioned it to the nurse and the anesthesiologist and they just figured it was nothing.
Well it wasn't nothing. Thirty minutes later (about 11am) the nurse was back to check me. I looked at her like she was crazy because I knew nothing had happened since the last time I was checked. Wrong. Ten centimeters baby! It was time to go. (Sidenote: if there is a baby #3, and I'm not saying there will be, I will ask to be checked once more before getting the epidural. Looking back, I think I was probably in transition when I got the epidural. I am not crazy or against the epidural, but if I'd known the finish line was so close, I think I would have opted to skip the epidural ONLY because it took seemingly forever to wear off this time and I couldn't walk for hours after delivering J.) So at eleven am I was ready to go but my OB was not there. The nurse called to tell her it was time, like N.O.W.
So my OB arrived around 11:15 and got set up. And when she was ready I started pushing. (We need another sidenote at this point. There were only 4 people in the room for the pushing this time: my OB, Katie Hill the nurse, my hubby and me. With Lukas there was about 12 people in the room. Seriously. The was meconium when my water broke so the neonatal care team was brought in. I hadn't realized with Lukas that if there are no reasons to suspect complications, there are very few people in the room. I much preferred only having 3 spectators!) So back to the pushing. I pushed three, maybe four times and out he came.
It's true what they say, your heart simply expands and you truly can love another child as much as your first. I did not believe this until I saw Julian for the first time. We are truly blessed to have him in our lives and it's hard to think of our family before him. It simply feels like he has always been a part of it.
Thursday, October 24, 2013
At our friends house this past Saturday Lukas was playing with his friend Elise in her room. Every single toy she owned was out and piled high on her bed, including her various princess dresses and tutus. Elise told Lukas she wanted to wear her dress up clothes.
L: Lisey, I can't wear your princess dress because dresses are for girls and boys don't wear dresses. I'm a boy. I don't wear dresses.
Me: Buddy, you can wear one of Lisey's dresses if you want to, it's OK.
L: Eyes me suspiciously to see if I'm being serious.
Me: Nods head. Really, you can wear a dress buddy.
L: [screaming super excitedly] OK!!!!!
Me: Which dress do you want to wear?
L: (Without any hesitation): THE PINK ONE MOMMY!!
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Making the Most of Your Maternity Leave
Monday, September 16, 2013
Parents have beautiful babies only to lose them to cancer less than a year later.
Parents get sick with cancer and other non-curable diseases.
Parents lose jobs and wonder whether the money they've saved over the years will be enough.
I've known that life isn't always easy and I've personally been lucky in that I've not had too much personal experience with these hard life realities myself. But I have friends and love ones who are in the midst of these hard life things, and my heart feels so heavy for them.
One of my best friends said goodbye to her daddy this morning after a year and a half fight with cancer. He lived longer than the doctors predicted and my friend knows she's lucky to have had this "extra" time with him and is thankful he's at peace now and is no longer suffering. She's a strong one, this friend. Stronger than most. But my heart hurts for her and her mom. You see, my friend is a daddy's girl and I know there's nothing I can say or do that will fill the void that her dad's departure will leave.
This life is not forever. This is the one truth in life. So while you're here, say I love you to your loved ones. Say it often. Let go of the grudges. Say you're sorry. Forgive. And remember what is important. It's so easy to get wrapped up in the petty things in life, but today lets let it go and love one another fiercely.
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Their names are Julian and Lukas. And I'm their mom.
I am on week 8 of my second maternity leave and I'm enjoying it SO MUCH more this time around. I'm much more relaxed. I'm not fretting over every noise the baby makes. I'm not afraid to leave the house or drive in the car with him. I'm showering daily and usually changing out of my pajamas before noon. I'm even working out (i.e. walking/jogging on the treadmill and the occasional DVD) most days of the week. (If only I were one of those thin pregnant gals who didn't gain loads of weight. Oh well.) I'm not nervous about nursing Julian wherever and whenever he needs to eat. All around I am just much more comfortable with this mom thing. I guess those 2.5+ years practice with Lukas gave me a hand-up on the newborn stage with Julian. So this time around I'm not stuck inside all day long with plenty of downtime to blog. J and I are out and about so the blog has been one of the things I've let go for a while.
I'll eventually write out Julian's birth story and give some more details on how we're doing, but wanted to pop in for just a minute to share some brotherly pics and let everyone know we're doing great!
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Potty Training Tales
We're 90% of the way there now....but we still deal with a whole lot of poop...
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
Sunday, July 21, 2013
|Do you think they look alike?|
|Lukas or Julian?|
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Total weight gain/loss? At my appointment this week I'd gained a grand total of 44 pounds. This sounds excessive (as in, more than the "recommended 25-35 pounds") but I am ECSTATIC! This is TWENTY pounds less than my final weigh-in with Lukas. Let me repeat, 20 pounds LESS! Maybe if a kiddo #3 is in our future I'll be able to keep to the recommended weight gain, but maybe not. I'm still convinced your body puts on the weight it wants to.
Maternity clothes? Vomit. Please go away. The only thing comfortable to wear these days are dresses - anything too tight on my belly makes it hard to breathe. I'm ready to put these clothes away!
Stretch marks? Yea buddy, but I think they're just the old ones getting dark again. They faded after Lukas was born so I'm hopeful they'll fade again this time around.
Sleep? Considering I'm walking around all day feeling as though a bowling ball will fall out of my vagina at any moment, my sleep has been pretty good. Last night I tossed and turned quite a bit, and I have to pee multiple times a night but I remember my sleep being much worse at the end of pregnancy with Lukas.
Best moment last week? Having four days off to spend with my boys. I'm really trying to get as much quality time in with Lukas as possible before his little brother arrives. I know the time of him getting my undivided attention is quickly coming to an end, so I'm getting in as much Lukas-mommy time as possible!
Movement? Yes, but he's cramped in there so the movements are rather painful and jabby. You can even make out a foot and knee.
Food cravings? I've been eating toast with peanut butter, banana and honey every morning this past week.
Food aversions? Nope.
Gender? Baby boy on the way (at least that's what we've planned for!)
Labor signs? Yes. I'll leave out the lovely details, but things are happening, but of course there is no guarantee that real labor will start any time soon.
Belly button in/out? Out and proud.
What I miss: Where do I begin? High heels. Big glasses of wine. Sleeping on my back. Martinis. Graceful movements. Breathing normally. I could go on and on....
What I am looking forward to: Meeting Julian, hello!
Milestones: I am still wearing my wedding rings!
So here's the deal, we're just waiting for little dude to come any day now. I'm not due for another 5 days but my OB thinks he could come any day now. Labor signs are moving in the right direction and we're all more or less ready for him to arrive. I think July 11 would be a fabulous birthday, don't you? Any thoughts on when he'll arrive and how big he'll be????
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Friday, June 28, 2013
Total weight gain/loss? I haven't weighed since my appointment this past Tuesday, but I'm up a grand total of about 40 or so pounds. Yes, yes, this is over the "recommended" 25-35 pound weight gain (with still some time to go), BUT, compared to my last pregnancy, I'm doing great. I was about 20 pounds heavier at this point with Lukas. And I started both pregnancies at the exact same weight. So, yea.
Maternity clothes? Ugh, I'm totally over the same 5 dresses I wear every week to work.
Stretch marks? You know, I haven't really noticed them too much. I haven't gotten the linea nigra (dark line running vertically up your belly), which I'm happy about! Have I mentioned that I do have a few dark spots on my face that I swear are pregnancy hormone related? It looks like I have a dark circle /black eye under my right eye. It's pretty, really.
Sleep? Depends on the night. On the whole I'd say I'm sleeping well, but one night this week I was up with insomnia for about 4 hours.
Best moment last week? Sunday was a pretty good day all around. It started with homemade overnight Grand Marnier french toast and brunch with my parents and ended with an evening spent with good friends.
Movement? He's running low on space, but Julian is still rolling around in there and his kicks have become quite painful.
Food cravings? Cheddar cheese. Is this strange? And sweets - mainly cookies.
Food aversions? Nope.
Gender? B is for boy.
Labor signs? I've started to have more frequent Braxton Hicks contractions. Yesterday evening they were almost timeable, but stopped after about an hour. My OB has also indicated that things are "progressing" from the other effacing, dilating perspectives, but I know that means nothing as far as when labor will actually begin. So we continue to wait.
Belly button in/out? Out. As in poking out through shirts. But did you know that when it's "out" during pregnancy, it's not exactly that your innie turns into an outie. My innie is still there, but above it is now this protruding mound of skin. It's really bizarre.
What I miss: Gracefully being able to get off the couch/bed/floor.
What I am looking forward to: My last pregnancy massage and eventually having a very dirty vodka martini with my BFF with a side of sushi.
Milestones: Full term buddy! Come out, come out wherever you are!!!!
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Birth Plan: Delivery healthy baby
I'm serious, I have no expectations for this birth. I have hopes, but I've decided not to go into it with any game plan. Will I get an epidural? Who knows. Probably. I'll decide when the time comes. Will we have a birthing playlist ready? Nope. I don't even think we had music playing when Lukas was born. Do I care how often I'm checked at the hospital? Not at all.
I have one goal. Birth a healthy baby boy.
Now this is a much different perspective than my labor expectations with Lukas. So let's talk about that. Here is the actual birth plan we gave to the nurses at the hospital:
We have chosen to use the quiet and relaxed method of Hypnobirthing to bring our baby into the world. We appreciate your support of our choice for a natural birth with minimal intervention. Thank you for your help and care on this very special day for us.
IN THE EVENT OF AN EMERGENCY: In the event that the situation becomes life-threatening for either Ms. Swan or our baby, we will, of course, yield to any request for life saving intervention, upon the briefest of consultation. In the strong likelihood that we have the normal birth that we're expecting, we ask that you refrain from any routine interventions or measures that we have not previously agreed upon.
• Hydration: We ask that Ms. Swan hydrate herself with water and juice as desired, and will be happy to accept a Heparin Lock (but request that the Heparin Lock not be inserted in the back of either of Ms. Swan’s hands). IV to be implemented only in the event of complicating factors.
• Monitoring: We prefer intermittent monitoring as opposed to continuous. Internal monitoring, upon our consultation, to be used only in a life-threatening situation.
• Room Environment: We will be performing various techniques of self- hypnosis and for this reason we ask to be allowed to bring soft music, use dimmed lighting, and ask for the staff to kindly use a low voice - avoiding references to "pain", "hurting" or "hard work".
• Management of Labor: It is our strong desire to allow our birthing to proceed upon its natural course, in the absence of complications, without restriction to time. We plan to use pitocin or AROM only as a last resort after all other natural methods have been attempted.
• Vaginal Exams/Dilation: We request minimal vaginal exams – with permission. Please do not inform Ms. Swan of her progress or “lack of progress” in dilation. Please share such information with Mr. Cob instead.
• Coping with Labor: We decline discussion of pain tolerance or pain levels, and request that there be no offering whatsoever of pain management options.
• "Pushing": Because we are using hypnosis for childbirth pushing techniques, Ms. Swan will be using positions she finds effective, and this will be completely mother-directed. We ask that the staff respect our request and not direct us how to push, unless an emergency arises. We request a calm, gentle, encouraging atmosphere during the final birthing phase – calm, low tones of voice with no “counting” or “pushing” prompts.
• Breastfeeding: We will be exclusively breastfeeding our baby and request that no bottles of any kind be given to our baby.
Thank you for all of the care we've received during our pre-natal visits and in advance for the respect and assurance we know we'll receive from you during our birthing.
Ha. Do you think those things happened? No. Despite my lovely laid out plan, things veered off course. A bit. After hours of laboring through the night, I got an IV of fluids at 6am in anticipation of the epidural I decided I wanted (screamed for, even begged for), which I got around 7:30am. I was more or less confined to the bed thanks to the catheter and epidural (which was sweet relief and even allowed me a few hours of sleep after being up the whole night). The baby was monitored continuously once I got the epidural and I asked them to tell me how far along I was every time I was checked. Oh yea, and eventually I even got pitocin. Lots of it. And I distinctly remember counting during the pushing stage, which was done totally on my back (for only 15 minutes, thankfully). And right after he was born, Lukas was whisked away by the nurses to have tubes shoved down his throat to make sure he hadn't swallowed any meconium, so I didn't get the immediate skin-to-skin contact I wanted. I did, however, exclusively breastfeed and refused bottles even though he SCREAMED the entire day 2 in the hospital. So you could say things didn't go as I'd planned.
This time around I'm focusing on one thing and one thing only: healthy baby. And if he screams in the hospital on day 2, the kid is getting a bottle of formula.
And they say the second kid always gets the shaft.
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
KING OR QUEEN?
The Swan Palace can confirm that another little king is in the making. This was confirmed last week via an ultrasound tech during a routine ultrasound given to Ms. Swan at 35 weeks to determine the size of said baby boy. Thankfully, he was weighing in at 5 pounds 16 ounces as of week 35 and assuming a full term baby, he should not completely wreck his mother's vagina and future sex life as he is estimated to weigh a nice 8 pounds or so at birth. However, it should be noted that the tech did mention something about a wide forehead, but perhaps I misunderstood her as I was stuck on trying to understand how she could determine that his bladder was indeed full.
PACING THE HALLWAY OR IN THE ROOM WITH HIS WIFE?
Mr. Cob intends to be fully present during the birth of his second son. And by fully present, he means actually in the delivery room sitting in a chair up by his wife's head. He has no intention of witnessing the actual birth or cutting any cord. As for his wife, she is fine with this approach and offered that he can pace the hall instead if he chooses.
WHO'S IN CHARGE?
Ms. Swan. And by Ms. Swan we mean baby Julian. Oh and the fabulous Dr. Sun will be directing the whole show. (BTW, she is the most amazing OB in all of metro-Atlanta so contact Ms. Swan's people if you're on the hunt for a new OB.)
WILL THE PUBLIC KNOW WHEN MS. SWAN IS ADMITTED TO HOSPITAL?
No. Unless she gets bored in the car and decides to post a message to her blog, show pictures of the water breaking carnage on facebook or tweet her screams of labor pains for her 2 followers. But there is the unknown factor of the anxious grandmas whose excitement cannot always be contained, so perhaps they'll break the news on facebook for all to see.
HOW WILL PEOPLE FIND OUT THAT AN HEIR TO THE THRONE HAS BEEN BORN?
The "people" will likely be able to view a photo of baby Julian on Instagram or Facebook. (I should point out that Julian will be very disappointed to learn there's no throne involved and his brother had beaten him to it even if there were).
AND THE NAME?
Julian R. You'll have to wait to find out what R stands for. Unless I've already told you, in which case, oh well. I don't need comments from the peanut gallery on our weird middle name just yet.
Friends and family are welcome to visit us at the hospital. If we're close enough that you have my phone number, well then give me a holler and I'll give you the room number at the hospital. Just be warned that you might see some boob action, and it's not the pretty kind. And there is an admittance fee equal to a bottle of wine. And I won't even make you hold the baby if you bring me some chocolate too.
Sleeping on the amazingly comfortable "bed" in my recovery room and then hopefully taking a week off work to bring me the baby at 3am for another round of "please don't tear off my nipples".
More news updates as Ms. Swan enters the final weeks of her pregnancy. How much weight will she gain? What color will the baby's hair be (since the ultrasound tech did confirm HE HAS HAIR!!! as opposed to his bald big brother)? Will she resort to any old wives tales to get the baby out early? Stay tuned for these and other questions "the people" are just dying to know.
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Friday, May 24, 2013
Total weight gain/loss? Up 32.5 pounds total. So let's take a minute to talk about this and the fact that I absolutely lost my shit last Friday when I weighed myself and the scale told me I'd gained 5 pounds in one week. (For those keeping score, that is considered "excessive weight gain".) Since then I've actually lost 2.2 pounds. So I was probably seriously retaining water last week. Also I had just come off my birthday week and was eating leftover carrot cake every night. And I wasn't walking more than 6,000 or so steps a day. Excuses, excuses. Yes. Whatever the cause, I am actually sticking to my theory that this time around it has been better to weigh myself more often than not. When I weigh and realize I'm venturing into excessive weight gain territory, I make a conscious effort to scale down on snacking, up my walking and reduce my carb intake. I'm not depriving myself by any means, I'm just more aware of what I'm eating and what exercise I'm getting. And it seems to be working. Something will have to go terribly wrong for me to put on 30 more pounds in the next 7+ weeks to hit the 60+ weight gain I had with Lukas. This is a good thing.
Maternity clothes? Yes and they're starting to really bore me.
Stretch marks? The old ones are getting darker. Yay.
Sleep? After a week (last week) of waking every night to horrible leg cramps, this week has been a joy in the sleep department. I'm listening to a new hypnobirthing meditation before bed and have slept through the night all week. It's great.
Best moment last week? Going to the aquarium with Lukas and having him hold my hand the whole day.
Movement? My little ninja warrior is getting down to business - cramped space be damned!
Food cravings? Nothing particular.
Food aversions? Nope.
Gender? Beautiful baby boy.
Labor signs? The occasional Braxton Hicks contractions.
Belly button in/out? Half & half.
What I miss: My sanity.
What I am looking forward to: Drinking wine.
Milestones: The little dude is 95% daytime potty trained!!! This is a very big milestone in our house right now.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
I hope my post last month on the Toddler Clothes Battle and the tips to combat the fight were helpful to you! But in my house there is another wardrobe battle raging on: the Mommy “what to wear” Wardrobe Fight. As if keeping up with current trends and whether or not color blocking and chunky wedges are “in” this season, new mommies and moms-to-be struggle with what to wear for their ever changing figure.
Five years ago I was preparing for my upcoming wedding and woke up at 5am to attend a daily boot camp class before work. I lost a few pounds, toned up and enjoyed clothes and shopping! Then I got pregnant in early 2010 and suddenly my wardrobe options shrank. A sixty pound pregnancy weight gain only made matters worse. Flowy maternity dresses were my go-to option for those 9 months. Then my post-partum body was constantly changing and it took me a full year to lose all the “baby weight”. My closet held clothes in six different sizes and I never knew what would fit at any given moment. It wasn’t until my son was almost 18 months old that I figured out how to fit exercise into my working mom life and finally felt good about my body again. And then I went and got pregnant again and the cycle has started all over.
If I could wear yoga pants and tee-shirts every day, I probably would. But my office has a “business casual” dress code and something tells me yoga pants, even for a pregnant woman, don’t count, so I have to try to find an appropriate outfit 5 days a week. While maternity clothes have come a long way over the years (as my mother is happy to remind me), it is still difficult to maintain a positive self-image when I feel like I’m constantly on parade with my growing belly (especially when people decide that comments about your appearance are totally acceptable when you’re pregnant. “Wow, look at you!” isn’t a compliment to a 6 months pregnant woman).
But since mommies and mommies-to-be can’t hide under the covers all day (or only wear yoga pants), how can we best handle our changing bodies and even embrace them? I personally have really struggled with maintaining a positive self-image over the past few years, but have found a few things that help.
Remember WHY your body is changing/has changed! You’re growing another human being and are literally creating new life! This is an amazing thing and should not be forgotten when you look in the mirror or fail to button your pre-pregnancy pants.
Indulge in one outfit that makes you feel beautiful. During my first pregnancy I coveted one designer’s maternity clothes but opted for cheaper dresses and outfits since I’d only be wearing them for a short period of time. Big mistake. The second time around I purchased a wrap maternity dress from the designer and I LOVE it. I wear it at once a week and feel great about myself every time I put it on, even on mornings where I’m otherwise feeling less than pretty.
Accessorize! Shoes and chunky necklaces (particularly in fun, bright colors) don’t care what size your waist is and are a great way to liven up any outfit (especially when you’ve resolved to only wear black the last few weeks of pregnancy).
Be kind to yourself. Remember that no one else is as critical of your body or outfit as you are. And if someone compliments you, don’t dismiss them off hand. Say thank you and smile a little brighter. Your baby and older children don’t care how you look, all they see is mommy and they love you for who you are, so try to do the same for yourself!
How have you handled your changing figure during pregnancy and beyond?